Monday, November 7, 2022

The switch and the closure

I wish there was a switch within all of us. I wish we could just turn on and off our emotions. It would have been so much easier to breath then, so much easier to feel alive. I guess heart is the only thing that doesn't make a noise when it shatters; it just breaks silently.

I am certain I love with the entire force of the universe, and it feels too much to ask another human to take that in. I have often noticed that my heart speaks with more clarity when I sit for a time on my own, in the dark, and just listen.

Then I noticed. My thoughts were destroying me. I tried not to think. But the silence was a killer too.

As soon as I catch myself missing someone who left my life, I remind myself that them not being part of my present is a consistent choice that they make everyday. They wake up and decide to maintain the silence. They are indifferent to the space that gets larger between us. Isn't that in itself a pretty powerful closure.

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